Season Preview 2016 – South Sydney Rabbitohs

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South Sydney RabbitohsRusty needs to take more of a role in the running of South Sydney. He is a man of many faces and those skills are being wasted on the silver screens of Hollywood.

In order to inspire his troops, Russell could reprise his role as John Beibe from the movie Mystery, Alaska. In the movie, Russell gives plenty of inspirational speeches to a bunch of hick hockey players to inspire them to victory against a NHL side. It is rumoured Russell used one of the speeches from the film in the clubs recent team trip to his farm in Nana Glen (See speech here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bCv_NgL-5jM ) in an effort to rev up Keary. Having been diagnosed with small man syndrome earlier that year, Keary took offence and stormed out.

Russell could also use what he learned in researching the role of John Nash in A Beautiful Mind, to take on the role of managing Souths salary cap. Russell (as John Nash): “You see, If we want Burgess, we are going to have to integrate to a parabola and with the use of Pythagoras’ theorem we can manipulate the figures to bring him back to Souths”. Such is the skill of the man, he could then switch to the character of Robin Hood in order to take from the rich and give to the poor: Take from the rich (in tattoos) Chris McQueen and (in No-Dose) Dylan Walker, to give to poor old Sammy “England Rugby hates me” Burgess.

He could take on the role of the Skinhead from Romper Stomper to kick in the skulls if players that don’t do what Michael Maguire asks. Switch to a Gladiator and bash the skulls of peeps who don’t do what Michael Maguire asks. Also, if anyone doesn’t do what Michel Maguire asks, Crowe will punch you in the face. This will not be playing any role per se, just Russell doing what he loves most.

Unfortunately for Souths fans, with the loss of a few players and reported discontent within the team, it seems Russell may have to put on a worn out toga and reprise his role of Noah in order to save this seasons sinking ship. I think he may have put too many Burgess’s on the boat.

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